The Hardest Task in Missions Isn’t Going. It’s Sending.

We prepare missionaries for the field. But who prepares the families they leave behind?

I used to think that the hardest thing in missions was saying “yes” to God and getting on the plane.

After nearly four decades overseas, through war zones and persecution, through sickness and sacrifice, I thought I understood hardship. I thought I understood “calling.” But I was wrong. I didn’t understand the hardest part. Not really.

The hardest task in missions isn’t going. It’s sending.

We Train the Goers. But Who Trains the Senders?

When Ruth and I left for the mission field, we went with ten weeks of training. Later, when we trained others, it was eight to ten weeks of language, culture, strategy, and spiritual preparation. We equipped people for the challenges ahead.

But as I’ve reflected, especially now, as a grandfather, I can’t stop asking this question:

Who trains the parents, grandparents, and churches who send those missionaries?

Who walks them back to their cars after waving goodbye at the gate?
Who helps them celebrate birthdays and holidays with empty chairs at the table?
Who prepares them for five-year stretches with no hugs, no visits, no physical presence?

A Son’s Desire to Go… and a Father’s Grief to Send

Looking back, I realize: I had the son’s desire to go, but not the father’s heart to send.

Now, as I imagine my own children and grandchildren stepping onto planes to serve Jesus overseas, I feel a new ache in my soul. The same ache I saw on my parents’ faces. The same ache I didn’t know how to name.

It’s a beautiful ache. It’s a holy grief. But it is grief nonetheless.

And I owe an apology to every parent, every grandparent, every pastor, every best friend who’s ever walked a missionary to their gate.

Let’s Be a Church That Sees the Senders

We say we “hold the ropes” for missionaries. But who’s holding the rope for those who hold the ropes?

The Church must rise up to see and support the senders, not just the ones who go.
Let’s walk them to their cars. Let’s write them letters. Let’s celebrate them for their obedience, sacrifice, and the very real cost they carry.

To the Senders…

If you’ve ever put your child or grandchild on a plane for Jesus,
If you’ve ever watched a friend or a sibling say goodbye to comfort and safety,
If your heart has ever broken while your hands blessed…

Thank you.

You’ve done the hardest task in missions.
And I see you now.